Tuesday, November 09, 2010

In Appreciation For Your Contribution...

We'd like to give you...

Blibbity blah blabinski...

I would rather just be appreciated while I'm making the contribution - you know? During the giving of my heart and soul to something I find worthwhile. Rather than waiting till the end to receive a certificate or flowers - the size of which never fails to feel like it correlates to or reflects the efficiency or magnitude of my contribution, or so it seems.

Honestly? I'd rather just have a hug...while I'm hustling, while I'm doing what you'd later like to show me your appreciation for. Sometimes that can save you the cost of the plaque and me the time it takes to trim the bottoms off the flowers.

I'd rather be told "thank you" as I'm in the process of showing up and trying hard. I'd like to have someone show me their appreciation by being wonderful to work with - and offering a smile and a compliment during the ordeal.

That includes relationships of any kind. Mother's Day is amazing and I appreciate it - but it's the phone calls the other 364 days of the year that mean the most. Thank you - my kid knows that. Or even a friendship rekindled...the appreciation is shown and the hope of maintaining a relationship is kept alive by both parties willing to make a phone call, if only to say, thought of you today, rather than awaiting a face-to-face that may never occur. It's why I can't stand the movie, "He's Just Not That Into You" - what a sucky credo to live by. it gives men AND women the tacit permission to treat and be treated poorly and unappreciated because they don't meet the magic, secret minimum requirements that simply being a part of humanity should in fact trump. (Again, one of those sentences that assures that it's just me and the remote tonight in bed...) It is as if a kiss-off should be expected...and you shouldn't feel hurt - as long as you get flowers in the end. You should have seen it coming - if you had seen the movie you'd know this is how it rolls.

My response to that is - Just be nice cuz I have flowers growing in my back yard already.

I believe that every day that passes we have an opportunity to show appreciation for the work in progress - life. All of it. Even the stinky parts. Even if the end result of what you are hoping to be appreciative for doesn't quite jam into the box that you have labeled with that particular effort. If we don't show our appreciation with a tender word, a kiss, a hug or even a fist bump, one day it may be too little too late.

It's why I like calendars so much - especially the calendars sent by specific charities soliciting you for donations. I get about two dozen a year. And each charity always marks up the pages with days that they believe represent things we should remember and be thankful for. Things you never think of. I got the USO calendar and am looking forward to appreciating Battle of the Bulge day. Although in my house, isn't that every day?! One day I'm going to combine them all and just be thankful and appreciative every day of the year - for really weird stuff. The calendar I'm really searching for is the pagan calendar. I bet they have some doozies on their calendar. Happy Vodka Day!!! Happy Butt Grabbing Day!!!

But I notice it is so hard for lots of folks. They don't appreciate off the top of their heads. A lot of that comes from guilt. Although I have seen people appreciate because of guilt. Guilt Appreciation arises from I know I haven't been treating you well all along, so I hope you will accept this bouquet as a token of my I'm-So-Sorry-You-Caught-Me-Ragging-You-Out-Behind-Your-Back. Fear also has a lot to do with tokens of appreciation - I hope you will accept this token of my I'm-So-Sorry-You-Caught-Me-Being-A-Classless-Ass-And-You-Don't-Blog-Me-By-Name... I do have that mouth, you know. And these quick little fingers.

I've decided that I'm coming up with a list of my own things to appreciate. Today - I shall appreciate flaws. I am going to find the tragic beauty in imperfection in all things. Maybe I'll start with my mother??

No! Wait!!! I got it. I'll start with me!!

And then I'll move on to Stanley Tucci. He is not imperfect. Except that he has not called. I'm not going to hold it against him. I'm going to hold something else against him. Soon as he calls.

You know you love me - Candi

1 comment:

Gerry said...

Candi: it really is amazing how much the small things (or what some folks might consider 'small') make every day worthwhile. That hug, compliment, fist bump (the latter of which my son excels at), or hearing from a friend or a song you love...that beats outs all other accolades hands down. And as you say, it's the words that come from the heart and not just because it's a certain day. I try to never take anything for granted and be thankful for everything I have. Friends, family, (relatively) good health, and the ability to laugh, even after life kicks the bejeebers out of me, top my list. No trophy can match those.

Incidentally, let me know when you find out when Vodka Day is, and I'll watch out for Otis Redding Day. There's two celebrations I'd like to see Hallmark tap into!